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  • Being Angry Isn’t Bad; Having No Outlet to Direct It Is

    The Many Ways Anger Can Hurt Us

    How many of you have let your tempers get the best of you in your life?

    Once?

    Twice?

    So often that you just can’t keep track anymore?

    Being angry and seeing red can really screw us over. Whether it’s:

    • Listening to someone we disagree with
    • Not understanding an explanation when something is said to us
    • Getting accused of something we didn’t do but were somehow expected to fix
    • Getting into a car accident because of someone else’s negligence
    • Being overlooked for a promotion
    • Or, worse, needing to shout because we feel unheard

    No one takes the loud person seriously.

    Why would they?

    Everyone reacts more to the “sudden change in demeanor” than to the underlying reason someone is reacting so strongly in the first place.

    Sometimes people can feel their tempers climbing for a myriad of reasons. Some of those reasons may even be justified.

    Still, everyone seems quicker to say, “They suddenly became livid,” than to ask, “Why did their reaction change?”

    From personal experience, one underlying issue that could be driving someone toward anger is merely:

    Helplessness.

    When You Can See a Future You Can’t Reach

    Feeling helpless is one of the worst feelings anyone can experience.

    You can see how things could be better. You know that you want to provide more for your loved ones. You want margin, breathing room, and a life you actually want to experience.

    It can feel so close that you could almost reach for it.

    Then reality steps in and reminds you that imagined life is still out of reach.

    How many times have you imagined:

    You want to take a trip, but you have to wait for it?

    You want to give someone a decent gift, but it doesn’t fit into your budget?

    How about supporting a cause you care about, but you have to choose your bills instead?

    How many years has “not today” been the default answer while you keep putting your life on hold?

    My question has always been:

    Why NOT today?

    Don’t Rush Out the Door Yet

    Obviously, we can’t have everything.

    That is both reasonable and the thing that pisses me off.

    However, we only have so much time and energy on our hands, whether we’re working adults, students trying to get ahead, caring for loved ones, or being the breadwinner.

    The thing I personally need to do is channel my own temper into one problem at a time.

    It isn’t easy.

    Sometimes it looks like our ship is full of so many holes that we instinctively believe that if we patch every hole simultaneously, we’ll stop sinking.

    On paper, it makes sense.

    But realistically, how many times have we burned ourselves out doing exactly that?

    That doesn’t mean we sit there and politely watch the ship sink.

    It means choosing which hole is letting in the most water and plugging that one first.

    Anger can help with that.

    Anger can tell us, “I am fucking tired of this,” and give us energy to take action.

    The problem is when that sentence has nowhere to go.

    If I’m angry about money, screaming at my bank account isn’t going to increase it.

    If I’m angry about my health, beating myself up for not being stronger doesn’t make me stronger.

    If I’m angry because someone refuses to listen to me, replaying the argument for six hours doesn’t suddenly make them understand.

    But that anger can still become action.

    I can apply somewhere else.

    I can train.

    I can write.

    I can learn something.

    I can document the problem.

    I can walk away from something that keeps draining me.

    Anger doesn’t have to disappear before we do something productive with it.

    Do NOT Confuse Anger With Excuses

    For my particular problem, I’ve been carrying more anger for four months because my rental unit’s AC has been down.

    No matter how many emails I send.

    No matter how many maintenance requests I make.

    No matter how often I go to the office explaining the same issue, asking what part my unit needs, what the actual diagnosis is, and what work maintenance has done during those four months of me chasing them, I get no answer other than silence.

    I sleep during the day.

    It gets extremely hot when the sun hits my unit, even with a sheet acting as a curtain to block some of the sunlight. That doesn’t stop the heat from being absorbed into the building and turning my studio into an oven.

    As much as I want to scream, as much as I want to make someone try sleeping in my apartment during the hottest part of the day so they can experience what I’ve had to, chewing people out only makes things worse.

    Non-constructive uses of anger are simply forms of lashing out:

    • Speeding
    • Yelling at other people
    • Dumping your frustrations onto someone else
    • Being reckless

    None of these address or solve the underlying frustration.

    At best, they provide a few seconds of release.

    At worst, they create a second problem on top of the first one.

    That is why I think anger needs direction.

    Not suppression.

    Not pretending everything is fine.

    Direction.

    If I’m pissed off, I need somewhere for that energy to go where it won’t wreck my life.

    Maybe that means lifting weights.

    Maybe that means writing.

    Maybe that means walking until I stop replaying the same argument in my head.

    Maybe that means learning enough about the problem that I can ask better questions.

    Maybe it means documenting everything so I have something concrete to work with later.

    The outlet doesn’t have to solve the problem immediately.

    Sometimes its job is simply to stop the problem from consuming every other part of your life.

    Give Anger a Job

    It’s easier to give your money a job than to give your temper one.

    A lot of people can see the many ways money can grow:

    • Investing
    • Saving
    • Donating
    • Using it to build a business

    So what can we do to employ our anger responsibly?

    Some things I’ve been doing might be useful suggestions, but they aren’t silver bullets for my problems, and they won’t be for yours either.

    Everything I’ve tried is contextual. Some options aren’t always readily available, and when you’re someone who needs to physically move or learns better kinesthetically, meditation probably isn’t going to be at the top of the list.

    Sometimes the best job for anger isn’t:

    “Calm me down.”

    Sometimes its job is:

    “Make me move.”

    “Make me learn.”

    “Make me document this.”

    “Make me stop tolerating something.”

    “Make me start.”

    Physical Anger Needs Physical Outlets

    If anger feels physical—like punching something is somehow going to solve the issue—then lift weights, take up martial arts, hit a heavy bag, or go for a run.

    The shaking, shallow breathing, and narrowed vision can be signals from our fight-or-flight response.

    If nothing is physically trying to hurt us, that energy still needs somewhere safer to go.

    Take it out on a bag.

    Use it in the gym.

    Run hard somewhere safe.

    Train in a martial arts environment where there are rules, structure, and people who actually know what they’re doing.

    Not on appliances.

    Not on random strangers.

    Not on loved ones.

    And not on yourself.

    If Anger Is Emotional or Mental, That’s Tougher

    I don’t know how to deal with anger when it starts attacking from within.

    When it starts pushing us toward blaming other people—or ourselves.

    When it starts convincing us that we’re failures, that everyone else is responsible for our setbacks, or that we’re somehow defective because we aren’t further ahead in life.

    I don’t want to give platitudes.

    I won’t give you a list of things I haven’t tried myself.

    As upset as I can get, sometimes my temporary solution is simply to live out of spite until spite isn’t needed anymore.

    In Conclusion

    Anger is explosive.

    It’s powerful energy.

    It can kick us into gear, push us toward action, and help us become decisive.

    But it can also burn us out.

    Anger can protect us, but like fire, it can also burn everything and everyone around us.

    Use it to make a choice.

    Say:

    “Not today.”

    “Not today” can wait until after you apply for the new job.

    After you go out and meet people.

    After you try something you’ve never done before.

    After you take one step toward whatever has been eating at you.

    Just don’t let the fire burn you or everyone around you.

    Explore the Archives

    Thank you for taking the time to read this article.

    If you made it to the end and are curious to see what else is here, I’d recommend the following posts:

    Otherwise, if this post resonates with you or reminds you of someone, feel free to give it a like, share it, or subscribe for more posts.

    I write about a lot of different things: exercise, nutrition, sleep, video games, learning new skills, and whatever thoughts I feel are worth sharing.

    If you don’t mind that kind of writing, I’d encourage you to check out the archives and see if anything else catches your eye.

    For now, I’ll see you all in the archives later.

    Thank you.

  • I Have a New Appreciation For Music Now

    Learning to Play the Guitar Isn’t For the Faint Hearted

    I grew up around musicians in my family; aunties and uncles who could either play: ukulele, bass, bass guitar, acoustic guitar—a lot of stringed instruments for sure—and sing.

    My grandpa played his uke more often, I didn’t even know he had an acoustic guitar until a year after he passed away.

    He sang a lot.

    His family often played during family get togethers or after someone said grace to bless the food before eating, and he was friends with a lot of the old school local artists.

    I only remember Uncle Darren Benitez, he was funny, but I’m not gonna talk about famous local artists.

    The point is that music was a big part of my life as it was for my grandpa.

    I’m only now learning to play because I have the opportunity and the means to learn.

    Gramps wasn’t very patient when it came to teaching, so, I never learned to play and I wasn’t forced to.

    Now that I’m strumming his Islander brand guitar, I have a new appreciation for music now.

    I Absolutely HATE Learning to Play the Guitar

    I just started my guitar journey literally this past Friday and my left index, middle, and ring fingers hurt.

    Youcisian taught me how to tune my guitar strings from listening to it and the app tells me to either tune up—twist the knob up—or tune down—twist the knob down—to make sure the guitar is properly set to be played.

    Then, I’ve only started learning to strums the open string—you strum the string as it is—the first to third frets—if you look at the neck of the guitar with the lines running across the wood, each divider is called a fret.

    Frets pretty much changes the sound of the string compared to its open string counterpart.

    After that, I learned how to play riffs.

    Riffs are the familiar melodies of the song people can recognize to tell which song apart strumming the thicker strings—which are labeled as strings 6, 5, and 4.

    I’ve only put in less than 2 hours across 2 days of practicing different songs from the Yousician app; I love learning things at my own pace.

    However, I had no idea how difficult it must have been for musicians to create the end product of all of my favorite songs into what they are today.

    It took me out of being just a listener to the one practicing.

    • Zombie by The Cranberries
    • Stressed Out by Twenty-One Pilots
    • I See Fire By Ed Sheeran
    • She Will Be Loved by Maroon 5
    • Knocking on Heaven’s Door by Bob Dylan (I assumed this was a Guns N’ Roses song)
    • Something in the Way by Nirvana

    These were the songs that I was learning to play with Youcisian and, while I like most of these songs, I started hating them while learning to play myself.

    I keep missing enough notes to get a score where, instead of seeing next to continue my lessons, I see play again on my screen.

    How Hard Could Learning Be?

    If you have friends or family who are musicians, it might look easy to you because you don’t see how much time they put into practicing.

    Maybe you hear it, but trying it out yourself will make you see that it’s not easy.

    When following along to the song on my screen, I kept plucking the wrong string, my fingers got confused with where I had to place them on the frets, I kept missing so many cues.

    I never been so stressed out just by merely listening to Stressed Out by Twenty-One Pilots as much as I had when learning to strum the frets and riffs in time to the musical cues.

    Even going at 80% speed, or full speed, and my fingers on the frets and at the base of the guitar are not cooperating together at all.

    I can write with both hands.

    I can carry things in both hands.

    I can catch and throw things with both hands.

    Hell, I taught myself how to use chopsticks with both of my hands!

    Yet, trying to strum, listen, watch, and repeat was a nightmare!

    So far, after 3 days and less than 2 hours of play and practice time, the only thing I can confidently strum is the Happy Birthday jingle.

    I’m definitely not gonna have my own guitar solo any time soon and thats okay.

    Am I Gonna Make This a New Hobby?

    Maybe.

    That’s all I can say.

    I wanted to see what it was like to be the one playing an instrument than just be a listener.

    Sadly, I finally got curious enough after my grandpa passed, but that’s kind how life goes, no?

    Curiosity comes after a lot of things and mine happened after a funeral.

    I’m not trying to start a band, I’m not trying to become a famous musician.

    I just wanted to know how it felt to play and produce music like gramps did when he was alive because Yousician and music lessons in general aren’t cheap.

    I’ll see how long it’ll take me to learn to play songs I like and I’ll see how far I get in the next year with Yousician’s yearly subscription. It’s temporary for sure.

    Even if I never become good at playing, I’ll never listen to music the same way again.

    If You Made It to the End

    Thanks for reading this personal spiel about music.

    Yousician and learning to play the guitar definitely took me out of my comfort zone and gave me something new to experience.

    I’ll see how long I last with my self teaching lessons through an app.

    Otherwise, if I don’t post, I probably got cracked upside the head for breaking something that wasn’t mine to begin with—I’m only borrowing my gramps’s guitar, so I better be careful with it—and I had my family whoop my ass.

    If you’re curious to other articles that took me out of my comfort zone, I have a few down below.

    Feel free to explore the archives and I’ll see you all in the archives later.

    More From The Archives

  • Going Tech Free For An Hour: A Personal Experiment

    What Would Happen If Technology Was Put On The Side?

    I started getting headaches from staring at a small screen and doomscrolling through YouTube for the umpteenth time today.

    Nothing was interesting, nothing caught my attention, yet I kept trying to find something to watch.

    All the while, I then glanced out my window, and I realized how much of the day had gone by.

    I had barely eaten anything, scarcely had any water, and my apartment was still a mess.

    All because I was getting distracted by the thing in my hand.

    My phone.

    The thing that dominated my day, dictated how I would spend my time, and consumed my attention was the thing I depended on.

    Without my phone, I’m practically nothing. I use my phone to:

    • Listen to music and silence the thoughts in my head.
    • GPS my way around the island that I’ve never been to and through before.
    • I get to read books online because my back protests when I’m carrying a 20 pound backpack with nothing BUT books.
    • And other little functions I stopped thinking about.

    So, I asked myself, “what if I put my phone, and all of my other technological vices, aside for 1 hour?”

    No music.

    No video games.

    No background noises.

    Not even checking the time.

    Just an alarm set for an hour and three minutes later.

    An Hour and Three Minutes Later.

    Exactly as promised, I had put my phone aside, in plain view, and got to work.

    I started folding 3 weeks worth of clean clothes, I started cleaning through my clothes drawers, took the time to drink water periodically and snack on cookies, and felt interesting.

    Not strange; going without my phone or not jumping on my IPad for a while isn’t new to me. It’s just been a while since I had last felt more aware of everything.

    The kind of awareness where you don’t even realize how much you got done until you look around and think,

    “Wow, this got done faster than this seemed…”

    I wasn’t counting down time like I do at work when things are dragging molasses—my brain screams when 1 minute drags and felt like hours passed—then I felt my thoughts were a little quieter, and I made connections to idea that I never thought to write about before.

    Thus, this article had been born.

    Would I recommend every person I know to take an hour off from their phones, music, and habits?

    Not initially.

    I started this experiment for myself; I made this choice, and I would bring it up if someone was interested in trying it out.

    However, this was a personal experiment because I was getting myself sick—my eyes have been burning, even with blue light glasses and taking regular breaks—and, I figured, that I needed to reduce the amount of exposure for a little while.

    I wasn’t doing this experiment to be morally superior. I know I disengage from Life and all of its complexities. I just went after the very thing I know that’s contributed to my “feeling sick.”

    Solitude Makes This Challenge Easier; Real Engagement Takes Effort

    I felt better because I did this experiment when I was alone and at home.

    I didn’t have to spend a lot of mental bandwidth, but the real challenge comes from being out in public and with family.

    My parents and I have a typical modern rhythm where we would talk to each other for the first 5-10 minutes, suggest watching a movie, then my parents would be scrolling through social media.

    I get irritated because I’m trying to watch and their background noise makes it hard to pay attention.

    But I’m just as bad.

    When I visit my grandma, who is on her computer and talking stories with me, I’m not always engaged to what she’s saying half of the time.

    I’m scrolling through WebToons on my phone or typing away on ChatGPT, casually asking questions on the last thing I heard her say, without really listening.

    I’m a horrible granddaughter…

    In Conclusion

    I know that an hour a day is a lot to ask of myself—it’s easier at work because I don’t need my phone—when I’m at home.

    At work, it gets left in my locker.

    At home, family could be calling and texting and I need to respond. otherwise, my family might think I got into an accident or I’m mad at them, when I always leave my ringer on silent and never feel my phone vibrate.

    So, since every day is very likely gonna be different, I figured that I could simply set a low bar of entry:

    5 minutes.

    If I can go 5 minutes without my phone or jumping onto anything that normally distracts me, then I’m golden! (Yes, I enjoy K-Pop Demon Hunters, but we’re not talking about that!)

    Anything after 5 minutes is a bonus.

    Even though I’m not completely off-grid, I’m not saying technology is bad—a lot of jobs requires the use of our screens anyhow—I just think we need a break from it.

    Surprisingly, even if I’m just laying in bed and staring at the ceiling and listening to my fans run, it feels pretty good not listening to anything or anyone else for a few minutes.

    If You Made It To The End

    Thanks for checking this article out. It’s been months since I last wrote and, let me tell you, it’s been a struggle trying to find something to write about.

    There’s plenty to write about, though I’ve found that a lot of thoughts aren’t meant for sharing, but this one felt like it could help give someone a chance to think,

    “I might need to put this screen down for a second.”

    If you liked this kind of experiment, check out the other things found in the archives.

    Otherwise, I’ll see you in the next post.

    Archived Recommendations

  • Being a Life Long Learner Doesn’t Always Mean Learning New Skills

    Life Taught Me More Than Any Course Did

    When people talk about being a lifelong learner, they usually mean taking courses, earning certifications, attending seminars, reading business books, or learning a new skill.

    Did I do any of that this year?

    No.

    Did I suddenly become an expert in investing, business, or marketing?

    Also no.

    So, what exactly have I been learning?

    Simple.

    I’ve been learning more life because of life.

    2026 has probably taught me more than any other year I’ve been alive—not because I enrolled in school again, but because adulthood kept handing me situations where no one else was going to solve the problem for me.

    This year I:

    • Gained weight and spent the past year getting used to moving around in a body that looked no different from the one I’d known for years, but is different.
    • Interviewed for a job in an industry I had no experience in. Surprisingly, it felt more like a pleasant conversation than an interrogation.
    • Called the police for a non-emergency situation for the first time.
    • Spent months talking to different towing companies because people kept parking in resident stalls they weren’t supposed to use.
    • Continued following up with my apartment’s leasing office after my air conditioner stayed broken for over two months, because nobody was going to ask those questions for me.
    • Went to the courthouse to get a copy of my driving history and somehow managed to forget to put my paid parking receipt on the dashboard.

    None of these experiences made me wealthier.

    None of them taught me how to grow a business.

    None of them added another certification to my résumé.

    What they did teach me was something much less glamorous.

    How to deal with things I’ve never had to deal with before.

    Nobody sits you down and teaches you how to navigate apartment maintenance that drags on for months.

    Nobody gives you a class on calling the police over a non-emergency issue.

    Nobody hands you a checklist for dealing with towing companies, government paperwork, interviews in unfamiliar industries, or all the other little problems that quietly show up once you’re responsible for your own life.

    You just… do it.

    Usually because nobody else is going to.

    That’s the kind of learning I don’t hear people talk about very often.

    Being a lifelong learner isn’t always about becoming more productive or more successful.

    Sometimes it’s simply becoming more experienced.

    Life keeps presenting unfamiliar situations, and little by little, you become the kind of person who knows how to handle them—not because you studied for them, but because you had to.

    Adulting is still tough.

    The problems don’t magically disappear.

    I just find that each time life throws something new at me, I’m a little less intimidated than I was the last time.

    I may not have learned a new business strategy this year.

    But I did learn a little more about being alive.

    Sometimes, that’s the lesson life had planned all along.

    If You Made It To The End

    I welcome you here, in The Stratagem’s Archive. Do you think that being life long learners can exist outside of the classroom and overly pricy seminar?

    Leave a share, or a like, to let me know you’ve made it this far to the end.

    Check out my other articles if you’re curious about what else I have in the archives:

    This was something I started noticing lately and figured I could write about it since I haven’t written anything in months.

    Anyways, thanks for reading this little rant of mine and I’ll see you all in an official Archives worthy post later.

  • Living Alone Didn’t Feel Like Freedom the Way I Thought It Would

    School and Family Can’t Prepare You For This Stage of Adulthood

    Living on your own is a very interesting experience.

    Maybe you’ve lived with family for years, you were probably using the dorms through college life, but, outside of polished and safe environments, exist, “THE VOID.”

    The Void, as I’ve elegantly termed this experience, is where I’ve gotten knocked in the teeth real fast because no one has ever prepared me for what I was experiencing.

    Sure, my parents made me:

    • Wash dishes
    • Cook
    • Clean my room
    • Wash clothes
    • Taught me how to pay my bills

    But, being the first and only person who has to do every domestic home chore, on top of working, hobbies, and caring for myself, was not what overwhelmed me.

    I was overwhelmed by the experience of learning more about myself in this year long process.

    What Inspired Me to Move Out?

    Last year, I had the impulse to want to move out of my grandma’s house and live on my own.

    This wasn’t planned.

    It wasn’t something I had saved for, let alone earned enough for without stressing about rent.

    It was a spur of the moment where I thought to myself, “What would it be like to live on my own?”

    And the process went on from there.

    I was very thankful that I was able to afford my first studio.

    Trust me; its not easy living on your own in a HCOL state like Hawaii, where I didn’t need my parents to co-sign for me, on my $40k/annual salary, without roommates(I HATE sharing spaces), and as a single person.

    My emergency fund was just under $2k, my rent was $1.2k-$1.3k/month, including monthly utilities, and I brought home maybe $2.2k-$2.4k/month. On good months mind you.

    I was in charge of cleaning my open floor room, cooking my own food, taking care of my health, and working.

    No pressure, right?

    Domestic tasks were never my issue.

    The silence was.

    It Was The Quiet and Lack of Safety That Unsettled Me

    I grew up with my family living in a ghetto area where:

    • People were blasting music constantly,
    • revving their motorcycles or cars in the dead of night,
    • our dogs barking because people were walking near the fence,
    • Emergency services showed up often across the street
    • People used to steal our mangoes from our mango tree often
    • and my dad had sleep apnea, so his snoring kept me awake some nights because I thought he was dying in his sleep.

    When I moved out, I lost a lot of security measures:

    • No fence separating me from people outside
    • My bed is more than several feet away from the door
    • I would get anxious that someone would bust down my door every night
    • And no parents around in case something happened

    I used to lie awake in bed, trying to fill my apartment with soft music or ambience, but nothing stuck.

    I felt extremely vulnerable and needing to eventually get more safety measures for just in case.

    While I do have a camera facing the door from the side, my wooden dowel and my own self can only fend off attackers so long before I might end up either hospitalized or dead.

    Once you start living by yourself, then you can judge whether I’m paranoid or being realistic about my circumstances.

    Then Comes The Neighbors

    By the time you cross the threshold that officially means you are considered, “your own person,” is when you get your own apartment.

    It doesn’t have to be huge.

    It doesn’t need fancy gyms, a pool or a bar.

    Honestly, as long as you have your own:

    • Parking stall
    • Electricity
    • Water
    • In-house laundromat

    Then you are good and set for your lease term.

    Right?

    Sadly, while having your own place is amazing, people will make you wish you had a lot of money to move out REALLY FAST.

    At home, I used to have quiet neighbors, then the loud music blasting ones that didn’t bother us too much, and no one had much issues there.

    Everyone was familiar with each other.

    My apartment complex told a different story because everyone keeps to themselves.

    Fair enough.

    I do too.

    What I hated over the course of living here was people using my parking stall when I’m away at work and I’m coming home, barely able to keep my eyes open from sitting in traffic for hours at a time, to see I can’t even come home, park, shower, eat, and fuck off to sleep without constantly seeing inconsiderate people.

    When Things Are Okay, Then Life Reminds You That Logistics Wear You Down FAST

    It’s like coming home and you see cars parked in your driveway because your neighbors tell their friends and family, “they’re not home, just park there,” EVERY SINGLE DAY!

    Not only am I dealing with the logistics of:

    • Rent
    • Groceries
    • Bills
    • Debts
    • Traffic
    • And work

    I have had the displeasure to have to deal with people NOT my family who are: inconsiderate and take my damn assigned parking stall when I’m at work, who pound on the walls every day at ungodly hours of the day, and not to mention that every time I went to my apartment complex’s management team, they’ve only:

    • Sent out emails to residents to not have guests park in residents parking
    • Residents are left to handle their own issues— I had to submit a report regarding my parking had been taken for over several hours, after I had come home from work already stressed out—and my stall was only freed up because I had contacted the cops for a non-emergency to ask where the law could and couldn’t help me. The person only moved when the cops helping me were looking into the vehicle.
    • There are no signs saying non-residents will be towed for being pricks and be like, “this stall is open, so it’s free real estate. Residents can fuck off because move your feet, lose your seat,” somehow applies to this fucking situation.
    • And my only solution had been to keep submitting reports, take pictures, and HOPE the towing company comes down on time to tow the offending car elsewhere.

    I did exactly that: took pictures, filed a report, and I waited HOURS for a tow truck who never came.

    It’s ridiculous!

    Having police present finally sent the message that this is serious, but it didn’t have to escalate to cops.

    I just wanted to know what I could and couldn’t do legally because everything I’ve done through the proper channels hasn’t helped and I kept hitting wall after wall of services of: we can’t do this, or I’ll have to pay a fee because gas prices are just squeezing everyone at this point.

    Living Alone Puts Compounded Stress and Responsibility Back Onto YOU

    Work is physically draining and emotionally numbing; bills and debts are financially crushing; and people will make your life harder.

    Not like the kind of, “family makes your life harder because they care about you,” hard.

    It’s, “I fucking hate my situation and wished I had a lot of money or could do remote work, just to keep what little bit of peace and autonomy I have left protected,” kind of hard.

    And don’t even get me started on living next to schools either!

    I’ve gotten used to timing when to get home after work because all of the parents had finally picked their kids up and I made time to go to the gym. But the other thing about schools are other developmental issues that keep making living on my own, AND IN THIS COMPLEX, more stressful.

    Unnecessary New Businesses Keep Adding to Existing Traffic and Headaches

    A Sonic opened up literally next door to my studio a few days ago.

    A stone’s throw away, and the line to get into the drive-thru takes up one full lane and it blocks residents from doing regular driving.

    Thanks to the people who are blocking the road, the upside? I only have to cross 3 lanes of traffic instead of 4.

    The downside? People park their cars in my unit’s residential stalls to walk over to Sonic and never come back for hours.

    Every time I come home I can feel my stress levels escalating because:

    1. Sonic isn’t that good. I have better options elsewhere in the area
    2. People are curious and have devil-may-care attitudes, not respecting that people live in the complex next door, is infuriating
    3. I keep having to park somewhere else and stress myself into having a heart attack at how ridiculous having my peace constantly shattered.

    Eventually, the Sonic craze will die down, like it did for Raising Cane’s, but when? How long do I have to keep tolerating this stupidity? Why must my peace be broken for someone else’s?

    I have yet to figure out the answers to these questions, but I now know several things about myself.

    Before You Move Out, Do These Things First

    My situation will look very different from yours if you are planning to move out and find your own place.

    Thats a given.

    But, I wish I did this before I moved out, there are a few things you should consider first:

    What Areas Are You Looking Into?

    Where I live now is very close to my other grandma’s house, 30 minutes away from the grandma’s house I moved out of, and roughly 30-50+ minutes away from my job varying by traffic.

    At the time I moved in, I had to deal with the normal school and work traffic, and not much else.

    The area is quiet, except for dogs rarely barking, there are several fast food restaurants, grocery stores, and gas stations very close to me. I’m also paying for the outside amenities that were present in the area.

    Had I known I was gonna be living between 2 schools, I think I would have not moved in, because I have no kids of my own, but impulsivity won regardless.

    I wished that I researched what was in the vicinity of my studio. It probably would have helped me make informed decisions instead of moving in because I could.

    Next time ask what matters more to where you are thinking of moving into: Is it near schools, near public transportation, close to work? Anything else that would make it be worth living at this specific place versus others?

    Can You Reasonably Afford Living Here?

    I’m using my credit cards to pay for my rent, I’m still saving and investing every Friday, but that doesn’t mean I’m okay.

    While I am very thankful that I didn’t need roommates to live with me and split the rent, but that might be a reality you might face.

    So, rules of thumb to consider:

    • Make sure you know what kind of person/people you’ll be rooming with. If you can’t stand slobs, thieves, or people bringing their partners over constantly, then you’ll need to either compromise or look elsewhere.
    • How will you split the responsibilities between roommates?
    • What will happen if someone doesn’t contribute or pull their weight? Who gets the final say?

    Everyday I worry that I won’t be able to keep living in my studio, headaches included, and I’ve cut out a lot of things: BJJ classes, hobbies not video games, hanging out with people, etc.

    While saving and investing is still a molasses slow process, if I could do things over again, then I would have made sure that I had more money saved in case work slowed down again and moving out becomes inevitable.

    Can You See Yourself Living Here Long Term?

    While I’m currently moving into my 2nd year of living on my own, I’m not sure if I can see myself living in this particular complex another year.

    Thats my opinion.

    My current studio is a temporary home base; My things are here, I get to do things on my own without fighting someone to get out of the bathroom when I have to go, small pieces of mind.

    If management enforcement is weak and I’m tired of having to deal with issues myself over my parking and peace of mind, then I better make sure that I pay off my debts, save more money, and look into other places that might fit me better.

    The Reality Of Independence Comes With Constant Costs

    Am I saying that I’m not gonna have issues moving elsewhere?

    Of course not.

    However, I’d rather live away from schools and I don’t have to keep getting pissed about my parking stall, one of the things that I’ve explicitly pay for and is assigned to me, constantly being taken by parents picking up their kids or other residents inviting their family over to hang out and sleep over while I’m at work, at the gym, or just doing errands.

    That is something I’ve identified since living on my own.

    Every day life becomes maintenance and trying to not lose your shit.

    I still lose my shit, I still hope that I finally figure out how to earn money online, or get a higher paying job to get out of the school zone.

    Either way, if you think being independent and living on your own gets you out of your family’s business, I can assure you that I’d rather deal with my family than strangers any day.

    If You Made It To The End

    If anything I’ve written here resonated with you or you know someone who thinks moving out will solve all of their problems, feel free to like or share this with someone who needs more consideration than vibes and wishful thinking.

    You can even click on this Tiny Wave Button below to let me know you can understand or relate to the struggles of adulthood. It’ll take you to my Ko-fi, and even a visit tells me a person came by.

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    I have written other articles regarding:

    I welcome you all to explore what the archives has to offer.

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    Otherwise, I will see you all later in the archives!

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  • Primal Queen 6-Month Review: Honest Results (Inconsistent Use, Real Lessons)

    Here’s The Thing

    I’ve been taking Primal Queen for 6 months to see whether it could actually live up to its claims—and whether I’d fall into the 9/10 success group or the 1/10 that doesn’t see much change.

    So, what are you supposed to expect at the 6-month mark?

    • Enhanced mental clarity
    • Better muscle function
    • Improved recovery from physical activity

    My Results After 6 Months

    Here’s the honest answer:

    My results were inconclusive.

    And that’s not because the supplement “didn’t work”—it’s because I didn’t use it consistently enough to give it a fair test.

    Where Things Started Slipping

    Like I mentioned in my 4-month update, I became increasingly inconsistent with taking Primal Queen.

    And that matters.

    Because supplements are supposed to:

    fill in the gaps of your nutrition, sleep, and training—not replace them.

    They’re not a silver bullet.

    What Actually Changed (More Than the Supplement Itself)

    Here’s where things got interesting.

    Because I saw early benefits—especially with:

    • cycle regulation
    • fatigue
    • pain management (better than relying on NSAIDs like Tylenol)

    …I realized something:

    If this helped a little, what happens if I fix everything else?

    So I started making changes:

    • Cooking real meals (curries, rice dishes) instead of eating spicy noodles 5 days a week
    • Adding smoothies and bananas for easier nutrition
    • Foam rolling and using Tiger Balm for recovery
    • Letting myself sleep when I’m tired instead of forcing productivity

    Even though my sleep is still fragmented (waking up every ~2 hours), I stopped fighting it as much.

    Did Primal Queen Live Up to Its Claims?

    Not fully—but not in a way that makes it a failure.

    It helped in specific areas early on, but:

    my inconsistency + improved habits made it hard to isolate what was doing what

    Over time, it felt like both:

    • my results plateaued
    • and my reliance on the supplement decreased

    Would I Recommend Primal Queen?

    Here’s my honest take:

    • If I know you personally, I’d share my unopened bags with you to try
    • If not, I’d say:

    “Try it if you have the extra money—but don’t rely on it.”

    This isn’t a must-have supplement.

    It’s a:

    “test it and see how you respond” situation

    Will I Continue to 1 Year?

    Personally, no.

    I’ll still take it occasionally (about once a week), but I’m more interested in exploring:

    • other supplements with longer track records
    • stronger research backing

    Not chasing a miracle—just being more intentional.

    The Real Lesson From This Experiment

    This wasn’t a failure.

    If anything, it forced me to:

    • take my nutrition more seriously
    • improve recovery habits
    • stop relying on convenience foods
    • and think long-term about my health

    Ironically:

    my inconsistency with the supplement led to better consistency in everything else

    Final Thoughts

    If you’re expecting a supplement to fix everything, this probably won’t.

    If you’re already working on:

    • your nutrition
    • your recovery
    • your training

    …it might help fill in some gaps.

    Just don’t expect it to carry the load for you.

    Final CTA

    If anything I wrote resonated with you—even a little—or if you’ve been through your own wellness experiment that didn’t give you clean answers either, you’re not alone in that.

    If you’d like to support The Stratagems Archive, you can do so by liking, sharing, subscribing, or clicking the Tiny Wave button, which takes you to my Ko-fi.

    And even just visiting means something. It tells me there are other people out there on their own path, figuring things out in real time, not just reading about perfect outcomes.

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    My Primal Queen Article Series

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  • Cold Turkey Dieting Doesn’t Work: Why Quitting Foods Without Replacement Backfires on Nutrition, Energy, and Habit Change

    Why Cold Turkey Dieting Backfires on Weight Loss and Fitness Goals

    It’s Easter Sunday. I’m at my grandma’s house for the first time in a while, and there’s a scale by the door.

    I step on it fully dressed—tank top, pullover, shorts, socks, phone in my pocket.

    150 pounds.

    My grandma tells me to remove my pullover and empty my pockets.

    147.

    That number sticks with me more than I want to admit.

    Later that day, I go home and look at my cabinet full of Nongshim and Buldak spicy noodles.

    That’s been my default food for a long time—quick, cheap, and familiar. But I started noticing problems: bloating, gas, constipation, and gradual weight gain from around 135 to 150 without really realizing it.

    So I made a decision.

    I got rid of all the noodles.

    No tapering. No replacement plan. No transition.

    Just cold turkey.

    At first, it felt like discipline and control—like I was finally fixing something.

    But within a week, everything changed.

    • I felt weaker.
    • More fatigued.
    • Work became harder.
    • My workouts dropped off.
    • My body felt flatter, like I had lost strength.

    That’s when I realized:

    I didn’t just remove food.

    I removed a major energy source without replacing it.

    My body didn’t see progress.

    It saw calorie and fuel deprivation.

    Why Cold Turkey Habit Change Fails in Dieting and Nutrition

    I’ve done this before with soda as a kid.

    When I quit cold turkey for 1 week(see a pattern), it backfired and led to bingeing later. What worked was gradual reduction over time. That’s why I haven’t had soda in nearly 20 years.

    So I don’t know why I didn’t apply that same principle here.

    But I didn’t.

    And I felt the consequences physically.

    Cold turkey sounds disciplined. It feels decisive.

    But without replacement, your body interprets it as:

    restriction, not improvement.

    And eventually, it pushes back.

    The Real Problem: Removing Food Without Replacing Nutrition

    This is what most people miss when trying to improve their diet or fitness:

    It’s not enough to remove “bad” foods.

    You have to replace what they were providing.

    In my case, spicy noodles weren’t just junk food. They provided:

    • calories
    • consistency
    • convenience
    • reliable energy during long work shifts

    When I removed them, I didn’t replace those needs with enough real food.

    So my energy dropped. My performance dropped. My mood followed.

    That wasn’t a discipline issue.

    That was a nutrition and fuel replacement issue.

    What Actually Works: Sustainable Diet Change Instead of Cold Turkey

    Instead of cold turkey dieting, what would have worked better is:

    • gradually reducing processed foods instead of eliminating them overnight
    • adding replacement meals before removing old ones
    • building consistent, repeatable nutrition habits

    Because long-term change only works when it’s sustainable.

    Simple Long-Term Foods I Can Actually Stick To

    I don’t need a perfect diet.

    I need a sustainable one.

    For me, that includes:

    • broccoli
    • cauliflower
    • mushrooms
    • soybeans
    • avocados
    • bananas
    • baby spinach
    • oats
    • rice
    • Any foods that I will likely eat and not waste.

    I don’t force myself to eat foods I hate. That’s a fast way to fail.

    I focus on foods I can realistically maintain long-term.

    Because consistency beats perfection in nutrition, weight loss, and fitness.

    Lesson for Anyone Trying to Change Eating Habits or Lose Weight

    If you’re yo-yoing between diets, restarting nutrition plans, or struggling with habit change:

    It’s not a discipline issue.

    It’s usually a replacement issue.

    You can’t remove habits your body relies on and expect stability without replacing them first.

    Your body doesn’t respond to intention.

    It responds to consistent fuel and structure.

    Final Thought: Sustainable Habit Change Over Cold Turkey Dieting

    I’m not trying to punish myself into better health anymore.

    I’m trying to learn how to actually support my body while improving it.

    And that means:

    Don’t just remove habits.

    Build replacements that last.

    If This Resonated With You

    If you’ve struggled with cold turkey dieting, weight loss cycles, or trying to “fix” your habits only to fall back into old patterns—you’re not alone.

    I’ve also created two fitness PDFs where I go deeper into my training, habits, and the systems I’ve built around self-improvement and consistency.

    No shame. No guilt. Only human effort around constraints.

    If this post resonated with you, share with someone you know is in the same boat, or you feel like someone finally put your experience into words, don’t forget to like, subscribe, or share around.

    You can tap the Tiny Wave button to let me know if you understand the struggles of making healthier choices.

    It links to my Ko-fi, where you can support the Archives or simply show that this perspective helped you.

    Either way, it means a lot to know someone out there understands this too.

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    Thank you again, and I’ll see you all in the Archives later.

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  • Take Control When Adults Don’t Listen: Lessons from the Rage Room

    When Adults Forget the Rules

    Working in a rage room is unpredictable.

    People come in to let off steam, but sometimes they forget that rules still apply.

    That night, a group of adults ignored my instructions entirely. I had told them their time was up. I made eye contact, warned them, and walked away.

    They slammed their weapons against the metal anyway.

    It was infuriating—but it taught me a critical lesson: how to handle adults who can act like overgrown children.

    And when this happens, you need a method to reclaim control.

    Using Controlled Force

    In a noisy environment like the rage room, yelling doesn’t always work. So I used controlled force: I firmly pounded my fist against the door to reinforce my presence, signaling they needed to pay attention, then entered the room.

    When I asked them again if they were done, and they said yes, I moved them out of the room.

    Simple, firm, non-negotiable.

    It wasn’t aggression, not in a visceral sense—it was clarity, presence, and boundaries in action.

    If you’re like me and are learning to set boundaries and be firm as an adult, then know it will feel uncomfortable at first, but it is a necessary muscle that needs exercising.

    Lessons You Can Apply

    • Be clear with your instructions: People often ignore rules because they think someone else will enforce them.
    • Use presence over physical force: You don’t need to tap anyone’s shoulder to be taken seriously. Body position, gestures, and a calm, firm voice go a long way.
    • Assert your boundaries: You don’t need to explain, apologize, or justify. Enforcement is the signal people respond to.
    • Learn from one-off experiences: That night was a one-off, but they are bound to repeat. Learning now equips you for similar situations.

    These are skills I practiced in real time—calm authority, controlled force, and follow-through—and they can apply anywhere you face disregard.

    Take Action Today

    Next time someone ignores your instructions or crosses boundaries, try controlled presence:

    • Stand in a visible position.
    • Use deliberate gestures to signal attention.
    • Speak clearly and firmly.
    • Follow through without apologizing or overexplaining.

    This works in high-stress jobs, meetings, or even day-to-day interactions where people try to push you around.

    Apply This Now

    Have you ever had to assert control when someone ignored the rules?

    Try using controlled force method, share your story in the comments below. If you found this post helpful, feel free to like it, share it, or hit the wave button to support the archives!

    Tiny Wave 👋

    Want To Explore More Rage Room Takes?

    Below you can explore with me how rage rooms can be an essential tool to our mental health and how they become a place where people leave their mark in plain sight.

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    Overthinking isn’t a problem here—it’s fuel.

    The Stratagem’s Archive is where restless minds turn curiosity into action. Subscribers—our Fellow Archivists—get access to:

    • Practical guides and experiments: From fitness flows to financial planning, video game strategy to online safety, try exercises and tools that work in real life.
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    • A space to explore, not perform: No pressure. No judgment. Just a living archive for discovery.

    If you’ve ever felt like you’re spinning your wheels, this is your chance to turn your energy into something worth exploring.

    Join the Archive today—become a Fellow Archivist and start experimenting with your curiosity.

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  • Stop the Spiral: How Writing Turns Overthinking into Action

    Writing Made Space to Think, Not Spiral

    It’s tough being a chronic overthinker.

    Your mind is anxious.

    Thoughts feel endless—until you write them down.

    Writing makes space.

    Mental spirals were never in charge.

    You were.

    Overthinking convinced you otherwise.

    The Struggle To “Write What I Mean”

    Writing wasn’t something that came naturally.

    Everything I wrote came from how I felt.

    It started as a way to process grief, then became how I expressed myself.

    150 posts later, and my work felt empty.

    Staring at a blank page didn’t magically fill it with words.

    My writing had to change.

    That meant trying something new.

    How I Started Changing Writing Directions With Copywriting

    Improving my writing was intimidating.

    Years of writing a certain way felt comfortable.

    But if I wanted to grow my blog, I had to push myself.

    I started using prompts—not the ones from WordPress Reader, but the classic “sell me this pen” kind.

    I enjoy storytelling, but like modern movies, my writing had too many extra words.

    Here’s a prompt I tried with ChatGPT to sell Bloodborne:

    “Become a real life Van Helsing with Bloodborne.

    Hunt in a gothic Victorian era with monsters, mobs, and a beast plague rolled into one.

    Want to experience what H.P. Lovecraft feared?

    Insight lets you see the Eldritch horrors in Yharnam.

    You will lose your mind long before you end their lives.

    Bloodborne—be the hunter you dreamed of becoming.”

    According to ChatGPT, this could be tighter. Here’s a revised version:

    “Step into the shoes of a real-life Van Helsing with Bloodborne.

    Hunt in a gothic Victorian world filled with monsters, mobs, and plague.

    Dare to see what H.P. Lovecraft feared?

    Experience the Eldritch horrors of Yharnam.

    Your mind will shatter long before your enemies do.

    Bloodborne—become the hunter you’ve always dreamed of.”

    Now, this would convince me to play.

    This Was How I Needed to Change My Writing

    Every prompt started messy—but progress was emerging.

    The shift? Write as a reader, not a blogger.

    Ask yourself: What would actually convince someone to care?

    That uncomfortable feeling—you’ve done everything right:

    Write. Revise. Publish.

    …and still feel behind.

    Yeah, it’s brutal.

    If you want to get better, you need two things: practice and exposure.

    Keep writing—and let your work be judged.

    Without writing, there’s nothing to judge.

    Without judgment, your work doesn’t grow.

    No judgment. No growth.

    Your Turn: A Prompt to Try

    Want to practice what I just shared? Try this:

    Prompt: “Sell me your favorite game, hobby, or skill in 4–5 sentences. Focus on why you love it—and why someone else should too.”

    Post it in the comments below, or write it in your own journal. Share your struggles, your wins, and what surprised you about your own writing.

    Enjoyed this post?

    Like, subscribe, and share with a friend who overthinks everything.

    Comment your prompt attempt below—I’d love to see what you create.

    Your restless mind is welcome here. Keep writing. Keep exploring.

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  • Staying Safe in Extreme Weather: When Work Keeps Calling

    When Work Won’t Close For Your Safety

    Have you ever been trapped in a storm, sitting in your car, gripping the wheel so tight it feels like your knuckles might explode, thinking, “I could be anywhere else right now—safely”?

    That was me at 4:30 a.m., driving through torrential rain, lightning flashing 18 times since I parked, and wind so strong it felt like it might push me off the road.

    Heavy rain, high winds, and floods had been battering our island for over a week. Sure, we need the rain to keep the greenery alive—but Mother Nature was working overtime.

    I work in a warehouse, and part of my job means hauling freight from the yard into the building. In ideal conditions, that’s fine. But today? Not so much.

    By the ninth lightning flash, one of them was so bright I felt momentarily blinded. Luckily, the road was straight and empty—but it made me think: why do jobs expect us to risk ourselves in conditions like this?

    Why Am I Working During a Storm?

    Simple question. Complicated answer.

    I can’t afford to look for another job right now.

    Life throws curveballs—rising rent, bills, fractured sleep, and jobs that expect you to treat your safety like an optional bonus. My assets are already set to go to my parents if something happens. Because nothing says “good morning” like questioning your mortality at 4:30 a.m., right?

    I’d love to work from home, write, or do something dry and safe. But my current job literally pays me to work out—just not under these conditions.

    So the goal for today? Survive. And maybe, just maybe, make it home in one piece.

    The Reality of Hazard Pay—or the Lack Thereof

    A little extra compensation in extreme weather would be nice. Even if it only happened once in a while, it would show management that they value our safety. But wishful thinking aside, the storm doesn’t care about your paycheck—it’s just going to keep raining. And we just keep working.

    If You Made It to the End

    Thanks for reading my work rant.

    Most of us have had days when we’d rather be anywhere else than at work—especially in extreme weather.

    And while this is my personal experience, the underlying reality touches many: jobs sometimes expect us to treat ourselves as invincible.

    If this story resonates, feel free to like, comment, subscribe, or share with someone else questioning why they’re out in the storm.

    What’s the worst weather you’ve had to work through?

    Explore The Archives

    I write about more than just questioning my life choices at 4 a.m.

    You’ll find posts on:

    Feel free to explore the archives or check out some of my other posts.

    Otherwise, I’ll see you all after I survive Mother Nature—and my job’s decision to stay open, rain or shine.

    Wish me luck.

    Update: Mother Nature is Off The Clock

    Never mind. I woke up earlier this morning, the rain had settled, the clouds were slowly dispersing, the sun was slowly peaking through the haze, and now it is hot!

    Like clothes sticking to your skin uncomfortably hot.

    At least I don’t have to worry about getting struck by lightning or drenched to the bone in the torrential rain anymore.

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